


Do You Want It Bad?

by Rinzler



Category: Banana Bus Squad, H20 Vanoss- Fandom, VanossGaming- Fandom, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Crossdressing, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-03
Updated: 2016-10-03
Packaged: 2018-08-19 09:28:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8200073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rinzler/pseuds/Rinzler
Summary: Feeling bored with their sex life, Jonathan decides to try something new. He just hopes Evan likes the idea as much as he does.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hopesPeak](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hopesPeak/gifts).



_ Laying here wrapped in white just trying to not fight again _

_ Cause I’ve been holding on too long just to let it end _

 

\-----

 

It’s not that sex with Evan isn't good.

Its great, to be honest. Mind-blowingly spectacular, even. Probably the best he’s ever had, and he has had a fair amount of sex, thank you very much. It’s just that…well, lately it feels like that’s all it is. Just sex. 

There’s a definite emotional connection- they’re dating, after all- but the actual physical spark has long been dormant. They’re having sex, but it’s more going through the motions than anything else. They have an unspoken system of who tops, of when they each initiate, even of what time they’ll usually fuck. That’s fine. It helps knowing when Evan is more likely to be in the mood, so they’re both prepared and don’t do something stupid like forget the lube. And the orgasms are still just as satisfying.

So why does he feel like this? Why is it suddenly not enough? Suddenly too vanilla, too plain, too boring?

Jonathan sighs to himself and rolls over in their bed, sheets tangling around his legs as he twists to look at the man lying next to him.

Evan always looks so peaceful asleep. He’s not necessarily stressed when he’s awake, but he is active, in motion, constantly working on something. When he truly winds down- when the computer is powered down and the controller put away- there’s a difference in his actions. He’s relaxed, shoulders dropped that extra inch, moving that much more slowly. When he winds down enough to sleep, really and truly sleep, he’s gorgeous. Slightly slack-jawed, eyelashes fanned over perfect cheekbones, legs and arms thrown recklessly about, entangling Jonathan and practically forcing him to cuddle or get kicked off the mattress.

Jonathan feels his lips curve into a slight smile as he reaches out and runs a hand through Evan’s hair, thick and dark, smelling of the weird brand shampoo he uses. It’s not off-putting, just unique. Evan lets out a small murmur and tilts his head a little into the soft gesture, and Jonathan feels his heart melt.

Who cares if the sex is different than it used to be? They love each other more than ever, and that’s all that really matters.

 

\-----

 

Until it isn’t.

 

\-----

 

It’s not even anything Evan does. When it happens, it’s all on Jonathan. 

He’s browsing through mods on GTA V, searching for an alternate skin to feature in one of his videos, when he stumbles across one that’s supposed to be some kind of a scary nurse from a generic horror movie. It’s nothing special, just a short white skirt and matching crop top covered in blood smears. What really gets his attention is the red-and-white mask the skin comes with. 

The mask is a stylized red x, like the red cross but twisted. The colors match the ones on his avatar’s hockey mask. It’s kind of gruesome-looking, but more silly than scary.

Jonathan snickers to himself and downloads the mod, then opens up GTA V and equips it. It takes a while to remove the pre-equipped mask and replace it with his regular hockey one, but the end result is worth it. His character looks hilarious. 

He’s still laughing when the front door opens and Evan walks in, carrying a grocery bag with a few essentials, including more paper towels. They ran out that morning, and Evan promised to stop at the store and grab a roll before he came home. 

“What are you doing?” Evan asks, putting the bag down and walking over. Jonathan spins the laptop around with a proud grin to show him. 

“What do you think?” He says.

Evan pauses and stares at the screen for a long time. Then he starts, like he just noticed he was zoning out, and steps forward. “Sexy,” he deadpans, or tries to- for some reason his voice sounds shaky. “You totally have the curves to pull that off.” 

Jonathan sticks his tongue out at him. “Hey, the viewers are gonna love it!”

“Put that back in your mouth or I’m going to do something with it you might not like,” Evan fires back. “What kind of video are you making that needs a naughty nurse?”

“It’s a scary nurse!” Jonathan protests.

“It’s a naughty nurse. Look at that skirt,” Evan says. 

“Point,” Jonathan concedes. “I was thinking of doing some kind of Halloween Fails video? Like, supposed to be scary but not.”

“I like it,” Evan says. “Now come help me with dinner.”

 

\------

 

_ Trying my best to show appreciation _

 

\-----

 

Two days later he does the first trial run with the outfit on GTA V with Brock, Brian, Mini and Tyler. Their reactions are fantastic.

“Doctor, doctor, gimme the news!” Mini half-screeches into the microphone as his character runs away from Delirious. “I got a bad case of lovin’ you!”

“Don’t let Evan catch you saying that,” Tyler laughs. “He’ll kick your ass.”

“Speaking of asses, you should watch yours,” Brian says, and two seconds later they all die in a fiery grenade explosion.

“You bitch!” Mini yells. “Get back here! I’ll fucking shank you!”

 

\-----

 

_ It’s like pulling magic from my mouth _

 

\-----

 

The video goes up about a week after that. The title ends up being ‘Scary Costume Fails,’ given that they’re still months away from Halloween, and besides, horror is a year-round thing. 

Within the first half-hour there are over 500,000 views. Most of the comments are focused on the sudden (and strange) avatar change.

“Told you they’d like the costume,” Jonathan says triumphantly. He leans back in his chair and raises his leg, propping his foot on the edge of his chair to he can rest his chin on his knee. He hugs his leg into his chest and grins at Evan, cheeks flushed red with pride and excitement. “I make a great naughty nurse.”

Evan chokes on his sandwich. 

 

\-----

 

_ Do you want it bad? _

_ Do you want it bad? _

 

\-----

 

That's how Jonathan finds himself on Amazon in the middle of the day, when he knows for sure Evan will be gone, willing his fingers not to shake as he searches for roleplay costumes. He’s just lucky he kept his separate Amazon account, even when they combined practically everything else. At the time, he didn’t want to lose his carefully-cultivated Wishlist. He’s thanking himself for it now.

The first page of costumes are all incredibly cheap. They look terrible. Jonathan scrolls back up and re-sets the search filters, going from highest cost to lowest. If he’s going to do this, he might as well do it right. Right?

This time the costumes that load are significantly better-looking. The first few are too much lace and ruffles, though. Jonathan’s not sure he’s ready to go that far. He’s just looking for something basic. 

A few more options scroll by before he pauses, about halfway down the page. This costume isn’t a two-piece like the others, but a short white dress with no sleeves and a low neckline in the front. There are slits on each side of the skirt that go practically up to the hips. 

….It comes with matching red lace underwear.

….It’s only $60. That’s not too much.

Next thing he knows, he’s grabbing the closest tape measure to get his measurements right before he clicks the checkout button.

 

\-----

 

_ Yeah she said, baby do ya? _

_ Or are you just comfortable? _

 

\-----

 

Paying a few bucks extra for express shipping means the package gets there two days later. Jonathan waits until the deliveryman has left before he darts outside and snatches the package from where it’s resting innocently, waiting to be sinned in, against the front step. Then he sprints back inside and up the stairs, not stopping until he’s safely hidden in the bathroom. 

He closes the door as quietly as he can. Then he flips the lock, checking to make sure it’s totally closed. The last thing he needs is Evan walking in and finding out before he gets a chance to even see if the costume fits. His boyfriend said he’d be tied up filming a new video for a few more hours, and he hasn’t left the office yet, but it’s still nerve-wracking knowing that he could see.

The box sits heavy in Jonathan’s arms, and he can feel his heartbeat racing, already keyed up just by holding the damn thing. He forces himself to put it down on the counter and takes a deep breath. It’s just a costume, right? There’s no reason to be nervous.

Jonathan tries to tell himself he’s not already regretting this purchase. 

He reaches for the box and tentatively pulls the tape off, wincing slightly at the loud ripping noise. The cardboard crumples easily, and he pulls out the black plastic bag inside, opening that with slightly more care. Folded neatly inside is the dress, made of a white fabric that looks silky and soft. He reaches out to touch it-

-and promptly twists the bag closed, flinging open a rarely-used cabinet to stuff it inside.

What the hell was he thinking? Roleplaying? He can’t do this. That’s a dress. A goddamn dress! He’s never even worn a skirt, much less anything other than briefs in his life! There’s no way putting that thing on is going to end well.

Besides, why did he get it in the first place? Because Evan looked like he was into the outfit? There’s no way. He was just projecting his own desires for something new onto his boyfriend. Evan isn’t that kinky. 

Jonathan unlocks the bathroom door and walks out. No. No way. He’ll return it tomorrow.

 

\-----

 

They go out for burgers that night. Evan notices he’s distracted, but waits until they’ve ordered and are sitting down at a booth in the corner to ask him about it.

“Are you okay?” He says, so sincerely and full of care that it actually makes Jonathan feel worse. Evan has always been absolutely honest with him, sometimes too honest. He doesn’t believe in secrets. He can’t lie to save his life. If Evan thought they had problems in their relationship, wouldn’t he have told Jonathan by now? Wouldn’t he have wanted to talk? But he hasn’t, which means that Evan must believe things are totally fine.

“I’m doing great, Evan,” Jonathan says. “Just a little tired, I guess. Editing takes forever.” He cringes internally, feeling terrible about lying to his boyfriend….sort of.

“Okay,” Evan says, and the subject is promptly forgotten in favor of their food arriving. Jonathan breathes a soft sigh of relief.

He shouldn’t feel guilty about this. There’s nothing to feel guilty about. It was just an idea that he decided not to act on, and he rarely tells Evan all of his ideas. Besides, the costume will be gone for good in a day, and Jonathan knows he’ll forget all about it.

 

\-----

 

He doesn’t return the costume.

He doesn’t forget about it.

 

\-----

 

_ Could I ever do enough to make you wear this love not like a collar? _

_ Could I ever do enough to make you feel the way you want to feel? _

 

\-----

 

It’s barely a day later that Jonathan finally gives in and musters up the courage to put the costume on.

He waits until Evan leaves to go drop some packages off at the post office, then hurries upstairs and digs out the bag. It’s a little crinkled and smushed, but the costume is still fine.

He has to fiddle with the zipper and hook on the back for what feels like ages, but Jonathan finally gets the dress on and zipped up. The fabric feels weird against his skin- it’s all stretchy and white, and it clings to everything. He’s never been so grateful to be so slender. He was worried about the neckline being too low for him and looking funny, but it’s actually just low enough, perfectly showing off his collarbones. Evan loves his collarbones. The hip-high side slits take some getting used to- especially because they make the dress ride up- but they’re not bad.

The only thing that doesn’t really fit are his legs. Not even his legs, really. Jonathan exercises, okay, he’s in good shape and he doesn’t have ugly ankles or anything. It’s just that the girl in the Amazon photos had super-smooth, shiny, very clearly waxed legs. Jonathan...does not.

It’s kind of throwing the whole thing off. 

He twists in the mirror, frowning at the dark hair. Now that he thinks about it, the girl in the photos was wearing cute red high heels too. Jonathan remembers reading somewhere that high heels naturally make your legs look great.

Hmmm.

 

\-----

 

Pain. Pain. So much pain. There is no level of hell that can hope to compare to the complete and utter pain stinging across every inch of his skin. How the fuck do girls do this shit? Why the fuck do girls do this shit?

He’s never going to wax his legs ever again. 

 

\-----

 

The red heels are another Amazon purchase. Jonathan knows he could just go to a Macy's or Target, but the chances of them having the exact bright-red super-high heels he wants aren't that high. Besides, even if a store did have those heels, how would he explain trying them on? Or buying them in his size?

He's even more grateful that he bought them online the first time he tries them on and practically breaks an ankle trying to walk. 

Evan better fucking appreciate this.

 

\-----

 

_ So the next time that you're sad, tell me that _

 

\-----

 

It's been four days since he ordered the costume. Two since he ordered the heels. Only one since he tried the whole thing on together.

Jonathan reaches out a shaky hand and traces his reflection in the mirror, twisting from side to side a little to make sure everything looks good. The dress is still clean white and untorn, the heels are perfectly shiny, even the ridiculous nurse cap that costume came with remains intact.

The overall effect is enough to make him blush bright red and go breathless at the same time. He doesn't even look like himself.

The dress makes him look even skinnier than he is, but gives the illusion of curves, with the way it clings to his hips. The high heels are doing things to his legs he can't explain, and he suddenly understands why women wear them. They're painful and impractical, sure, but damn does he look good.

He understands the desire to wear makeup a little better, too. This bitch-red lipstick is fucking fantastic. 

Jonathan bites his lips and turns so he's parallel to the mirror, then swivels his hips. He can feel himself blushing, even though there's no one around to see how ridiculous he's being. Starting to giggle helplessly, he backs up a few steps and then tries to strut, more confident since he's had a few days to practice walking. By the time he reaches the mirror he has to collapse against it, holding on for support while he laughs and laughs.

This is crazy. He's crazy. But at least he's crazy hot.

He's torn from his thoughts by the sound of the front door opening. He hears Evan enter and kick off his shoes, dropping his backpack by the side table with a muffled thud.

Jonathan takes a deep breath and looks himself over in the mirror one last time, blowing a kiss at his reflection. Then he walks over to the door to their bedroom, picking up the black scarf he left hanging over the doorknob.

It's showtime. 

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by the artwork of @monotonefair on tumblr.  
> Dedicated to hopesPeak/@bananabuslove, my IRL bestie who dragged me into this fandom kicking and screaming. Thanks for beta'ing this whole thing!


End file.
